Trying to order a Dell Computer

Last night I rang Dell in Germany as I am trying to buy one of their Mini Laptops with a solid state drive (SSD). The reason why I need  SSD is that computers with a normal hard drive often die (forever) at high altitude.

..and I only wanted to make an inquiry about this laptop

A hard drive sits on a cushion of air and the air above 4,000m is just not thick enough to make the hard drive hover. When you switch on your computer at Everest Base Camp, for example, you can hear your hard drive grind.  I had used my eight-year old Dell computer at high altitude for several years but this year it was just working too hard and it eventually died.

Anyway, to cut a long story short – I would like to share the conversation I had with Dell’s hotline operator last night. It was hilarious and I actually thought that I was in a comedy movie:

The conversation went like this (in German):

“Good evening, my name is Billi. I have a question about one of your products.”

“Ah, are you interested in a computer or a computer-related item?” (DELL does not really sell anything else).

“Yes.”

“So, what is your mother tongue (we have been speaking in German the whole time!!)

“German”

“Ah good – what is your phone number?”

“Well, my phone number is in Pakistan so I am not sure whether this is of any value to you.”

“What do you mean, you don’t know your number.”

“Of course, I know my number but it is in Pakistan!”

“Do you want us to ring you in Pakistan?????”

“No, I dont want you to ring me at all as I am ringing you”.

“Yes, but we have a long waiting queue so we would ring you back. However, we would only ring you back in Germany, and not in Pakistan.”

“That is very well but I am in Pakistan, so I cant receive your call in Germany. Maybe I should ring you back tomorrow.”

“Yes, that would be good. But can you please ring us from Germany.” (!!!)

“Hmm..that could be a slight problem as I am not in Germany but in Pakistan and I am not sure whether I will make it to Germany by tomorrow.”

“Ok..then ring us from Pakistan. Goodbye.”

8 Responses

  1. Radisson said on July 28, 2010 at 6:28 pm

    Asus EEE PC 1000 Series Notebook PC Intel Atom 1.6GHz 1024MB 40GB (SSD) 10 inch LCD Linux LAN WLAN BT (White) on the way with love x

    Reply
  2. Zeeshan Khan Minhas said on July 28, 2010 at 3:55 pm

    i read read it and i was funny. though i guess the funniest part is that the guy from dell seemed very serious regarding ringing from Germany.

    Reply
  3. mama said on July 26, 2010 at 2:29 pm

    sehr lustig, bin gespannt was er morgen zu bieten hat,soll er doch mal in gapa anrufen Heini!!!

    Reply
  4. Rosemary said on July 23, 2010 at 8:06 pm

    Will have to pass this on to my friend Moira, she has just retired from a very high position in Dell Irl. At one time it was her job to work with those guys in India.

    Reply
  5. Alex said on July 23, 2010 at 2:18 pm

    I used to love listening to you in hysterics while trying to get somewhere with the Internet people on the phone in Kathmandu! I miss you Billie!!! Al x

    Reply
  6. markus said on July 23, 2010 at 12:17 pm

    Billy
    sounds like a standup-comedy of Bodo Bach…….

    Reply
  7. Marion said on July 23, 2010 at 11:01 am

    … oder ein Witz, der bei uns daheim immer wieder die Runde macht:
    “Eine Tasse Kaffee, bitte. Ohne Zucker.”
    “Zucker ist leider aus. Darf’s auch ohne Milch sein?”

    Bussi, Marion

    Reply
  8. koji said on July 22, 2010 at 3:40 pm

    Haha,
    Reminds me of the time I had to cash a cheque at a bank in Nepal.
    “Would you like US Dollars or Nepali Rupees sir?”
    – “Oh, really, I can have dollars?”
    “No sir, just rupees.”
    – “OK, I’ll take rupees then.”

    Reply

Leave a Reply